Hannah and Essy's Blog

Hey Guys! (few as you may be…)

This is Hannah, just to make sure you know who you got talking to you here ;)
Essy and me have decided to do some serious posting about one serious topic. (Not that icons, bios, random silliness, and fiddling around doesn’t have it’s place, too). I’m pretty sure we have our topic picked, and I have decided to go ahead and start compiling my BHP (BigHugePost). Well, the topic we have picked is going to be about something we, as s, all generally deal with on different degrees. I seriously don’t know a who hasn’t had a crush, or liked someone. So, seeing as this is a pretty big topic, and perfect for a BHP, I shall share some of my thoughts on the subject.

Where should I start?! Well, I guess I will just jot down my thoughts about crushes/liking guys.

I only love my future husband: that is sort a good thing to remember. If you ask me who I have a crush on, or who I like, I say: my future husband. I don’t say that because I have someone who I want to be my future husband (haha! No!), I say it because I don’t know, and specifically because of that. When I see someone who I would ’like’, or when I have my eyes on someone, I just pray to god to help me give it all to him. I’m trying not to think about them, or talk about them too much, or write in my journal about what they are like. That is just too immature//silly I think. It is a waste of time, as far as I’m concerned. Your days could be spent in so many better ways than dreaming about someone. I don’t want that for me! I want so much for my relationship with guys to be totally and god-centered… and I have messed up on that before. I am praying for my future husband (and not praying for any specific person either…) and I feel like when I tell those silly ’crush//cute’ words to get out of my head I can act more normal and have a better relationship with the guys I know. I feel so guilty and dirty when the words pop into my head “he is so cute!”, because (I know it sounds awful), they do. I just can’t help it. So when that happens I just say to myself “God, I don’t want to live like that anymore. Please take all those stupid thoughts from my mind! I want my relationship with all guys to be pure, so please help me to not think silly thoughts”.

So, I have a new idea for myself. I am going to say I don’t have a crush on anyone. I respect certain people, because they trust in God, and are centered on him. When I see a young guy who is , and has given his life to god completely, I look at him and think “I respect him”. I don’t respect him because I think he has a cute face, I respect him just as I would respect any friend of mine, because he is doing what god would want him to do. I really don’t like the connotations of the word ’crush’. It just really doesn’t appeal to me. I’m not saying you’re like me, or that you should be doing this, or anything. If you are interested in someone, or are tempted to think too much about them, try to impress them, or act out around them: I would say pray for him, and pray for your future husband, and try to remember that if god wants you two to be together, he will orchestrate it sometime. Pray that you will act rightly in gods eyes, that you will not come across as flirtatious or annoying. Don’t pray that your crush will like you! Don’t pray that you will marry him some day, because, face it, you know you have done that before. I have done it, I confess, and I am not going to do it anymore. I know it’s awful easy for me to say that, but I know it is so true. And you will thank god that you prayed when you were young, gave it all to him while you were young, because it really pays off. I know it pays off just by observing other people’s lives, and I know that I want to be PURE when I am young so I can be BLAMELESS when I am older. When you’re older you don’t want to think back on your childhood and think “I did that so wrong, why did I have to be so immature?” You want to be able to look back and be satisfied that you did the right thing. My biggest motto is: I am loyal and faithful to my future husband, and no other. Think of your life now as if you are already engaged to your husband, and be loyal and faithful to him as if he was really there. If you’re engaged you don’t want to go around talking about other men you like, that is really disrespectful to your fiancé. When you’re tempted to think about guys, remember: “Would my husband want me to do that?”, and if he wouldn’t: do not do it! It doesn’t matter that you’re not engaged, or married, it’s still wrong to be immature when you are young.



Maybe you think it’s nice to have a boyfriend, because everyone else has one and you can’t see anything wrong in it. But I gotta say, you are going to get hurt. It’s inevitable, and you will regret it all.
It’s just so un-worth it: that’s not the type of love I want at all! I don’t want a boyfriend when I am my age, that’s awful. It’s not a real relationship, you’re not serious at all. You may think you love him more than anyone in the world, you may think that your relationship will last the ten years it has got to stand through before you can get married. It is so unlikely that it will. Is he really serious about you? Why does he like you anyway? And why do you like him? Why would anyone want to be half-loved? What I mean is: how often are two young people serious about their relationships? I wonder how often they actually have intentions of marriage, or if they just like each other because it’s something to do, and it’s fun so you want to do it. Don’t try to make yourself believe he will only ever like you, that he loves you and you love him, when you are both only 13 years old and have known each other for a few months. It’s better just to have lots of friends, instead of boyfriends//crushes. It’s easier to keep yourself on the right track that way. If you are going to be tempted around guys to be immature/flirtatious, just try not to get too close to them.
Remember: “I am too young for this right now!”.

In our society, which is so messed up, even 9 year olds have friends and boyfriends. So called friends and boyfriends.

She says that crushes are normal, that the only thing that’s bad about them is when you are going around blabbing to your friends about that ‘cute guy’ and stuff. Or if you’re flirty, or if that’s all you ever think about, you know? Maybe what your parents really mean is being silly about crushes, talking about them, and dwelling on them, daydreaming and whatnot is bad (not the actually crush itself?). Because nobody can stop you from having a crush, everyone knows that, and I’m sure your parents know that. There no way to cut off that emotion, it’s just a part of you. The thing you can do is pray about it, and not talk too openly about it. Don’t feel guilty if you know god would be happy with what you’re doing. If it doesn’t feel sinful to you, or if you’re convicted for yourself that god wouldn’t be disappointed with you, chances are you’re doing ok. If you grow up thinking that when you have a crush is bad, you’re going to think you’re an evil person for something you cannot control. If you could never have crushes, how do people get married? Is that sinful too? No! These are some questions people would ask when they don’t understand that having a crush isn’t bad in itself, but letting your emotions get the better of you IS.

I don’t think it is a wise idea, either, for that matter, to talk to someone you seriously have a crush on over MSN//email//chatboxes//blogs//websites//forums//message boards//ETC., because, seriously: this is how relationships totally FALL APART. I can’t name anything worse! When you talk to your crush over the internet it is WAY EASIER to say bad things because it’s not as embarrassing when you can’t see him! But then when you DO see him again in real life it is so EMBARRESSING that I would almost faint!!! That was how someone found out I liked him, over the INTERNET. So I don’t even talk to guys ANYMORE on MSN… it’s an awful thing. Just a warning. I was really messing up a few months ago, I was talking to a few guys over the internet, when I really shouldn’t have. I was really wrong to do it, and now I look back and think to myself “What could I have been THINKING!?” because I seemed so stupid to even consider internet relationships. It was nothing serious, just a silly crush, but it was sinful, and I deeply regret it. There is no POINT. I am never ever going to do that again, I pretty much stay away from all guys over the internet, because it is so easy to get into trouble that way. I should have listened to my Mum, she told me that I should stay away from guys’ blogs. I didn’t, and that’s the whole reason the silly thing started. I was pretty hurt after that, so do yourself a favour and forget about guys over the internet, 99.9% of the time, they’re NOT WORTH IT. Like in this song, which Essy already mentioned, Bowling Ball, by superchic[k].

Maybe he'll change
Maybe things'll get better
Maybe it would be nice
If he wouldn't always put you down
Maybe things'll work out
But maybe they'll never..
And I think you've given him
The benefit of the doubt

You need that boy like a bowling ball
Dropped on your head
Which means not at all
You have too much to give, to live
To waste your time on him (twice)

Maybe he'll change
If you could be better
But maybe it's not your fault
He's checkin out the waitress now..
But someday you'll change
One day you're stronger
And you will have changed enough
And it's time to get out.

You need that boy like a bowling ball
Dropped on your head
Which means not at all
You have too much to give, to live
To waste your time on him (twice)

You have too much to give, to live,
To waste your time on him.

You need that boy like a bowling ball
Dropped on your head
Which means not at all
You have too much to give, to live
To waste your time on him (twice)

You have to much to give, to live,
To waste your time on him.



A few months ago I had the hugest crush I had ever had, ALSO a big mistake which I won’t ever repeat. I was just learning, and now that I KNOW, I am never going to get that interested in a guy again. (unless I get married to him, of course!!!). But he had to move, and when he did, I realized how much of a pedestal I had been putting him on. He wasn’t actually that nice. I tried to turn a blind eye to all his weaknesses and faults, and pretend he would be all fine once he was older. I almost worshipped him, I was so excited that he was around. I sacrificed so much for him, and it was so wrong of me. I was sacrificing my opinions, and lifestyle, because I wanted to be like him. And I knew I shouldn’t have: but I actually imagined he had a crush on me too. I wrote long stupid journal entries about him, about how perfect and awesome he was, and how much I was sure he must like me. I prayed for him and about him all the time, and I was, in a word, pretty selfish. Please understand that was what I used to be like, but since then I have changed my outlook on guys, and I’m not going to fall into the crush trap. Crushes crush you.

-Hannah-